HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Oops—I didn’t mean to shout, I forget that a lot of people may have done a bit of celebrating last night. That’s something I don’t have to worry about anymore, but during my old “celebratory” days, I more than paid my morning-after dues.
Enough of all that - it’s out with the old and in with the new - congratulate yourself, you finally polished off all the Thanksgiving leftovers, found a new burial site for this year’s Christmas fruitcake from your Aunt Betsy, and made it to the other side of the big New Year’s Eve countdown. It’s the end of the first decade of the new millennium, and you’re here to tell the tale. I don’t have to tell you that it’s been a rough 10 years, but I believe that things will only get better. And you know what that means, facing the reality of some of those “resolutions” you kept toasting to last night. I did the same thing (who says you can’t “toast” with hot cocoa?) but I fear that I could celebrate this New Year, the Jewish New Year, the Chinese New Year, the Mayan New Year and whatever other calendar you feel like tossing in and I still wouldn’t get to all the resolutions I made. New Year’s resolutions are like going grocery shopping when you’re hungry—you always end up filling your cart with more than you can eat.
To give you an idea, here are just a few of this year’s resolutions:
I will not let President Obama’s power-mad dismantling of America make me crazy.
See, I know this one is going to be tough because just typing it again is making me crazy! I better move on, or one of my organs might explode (and now that I’ve had my appendix taken out, it might be one of the organs I need). Here’s another one:
I will take better care of myself.
Of course, in order for that to happen, they will have to stop making Peanut M&M’s, and in this economy I can’t bear to let that happen. And as for exercise, Santa didn’t bring me my requested “25th hour of the day,” so I don’t know when I’ll have time. I was thinking of hiring a new intern as my “exercise surrogate,” having them work out for me, but my doctors (and lawyers) still aren’t sure this will work. However, this last one I think I can accomplish:
I will turn every thought, feeling, idea, emotion, dream, memory, and waking moment into something you can listen to, watch, read, wear, or attend.
Okay, this is less an actual “resolution” and more “my job,” but let me tell you—I know what’s coming up this year and it’s going to be the best ever! You know we’ve been building toward something - with the TV and radio shows, Fusion magazine, the books, stage shows and simulcasts - and this year I’m taking things to that next level. 2010 is going to be BIG, and you’re going to play a huge part. And that’s one resolution I’ll have no trouble keeping: To do my best to bring you ideas and information that inform, entertain, and hopefully, inspire. I love my job, and I can’t wait to get back to work. It was an incredible 2009, but you ain’t seen nothing yet!
HAPPY NEW YEAR! (Ouch! I keep forgetting—sorry about the shouting),
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